02 . The Promised Land

We were wandering down Wilmslow Road on the way back from Em’s mum’s in Longsight, holding hands and talking shit when we heard a car slow suddenly behind us. Scared of rednecks or police we broke apart, started fooling like kids.

“You can stop playacting now.” A familiar head poked out of the passenger side of the old Fiesta cruising next to us. “Get in quick, before we leave you two losers here where you belong.”

The car stopped and Neil jumped out, flipping his seat up so we could bend down and crouch into the back, joining a skinny kid dressed in a Westwood polo shirt. We all shoved up, me squashed in the middle as usual, trying to retract my knees into my body as Neil put his seat back into position and slammed his door.

“This is Nick, he’s moving down here to go to college in Salford,” Neil explained. I shuffled round to say hi and smile, our faces were a little too close in the tight space and we turned back quickly. He seemed nice enough, Trev was driving, as usual. He smiled into his rear view,

“Hi there girls!” and turned to Neil, “You gonna build up or what?”

“Alright, hold your horses tiger!” Neil chuckled and started digging through a big black sports bag at his feet, bringing out a plastic bag stuffed full of weed. “Check it out Em!” he wiggled the sealed top at us and I felt Em react.

“No way, where d’ya get that from?” I knew if I turned to my left her eyes would be much wider than their usual stoned slope. Neil generally had that effect on her, but he ignored her question.

“No seeds in there you know,” he continued. “Lovely stuff.”

As he turned to busy himself laying out a spliff on the Road Atlas on his knee Trev drove on and out past the hospital.

“Where are we going?” I assumed we were heading to someone’s house for the night. Neil and Trev knew so many people from working in bars and clubs in town that they always knew where there was a party going on. We’d met at one of them and they’d adopted us that night; Neil called us their ‘baby lesbians’. He looked back now with a grin as Trevor indicated to turn onto the Parkway.

“You know you said we should take you next time there’s a party on at the Caves?” he paused, as we waited for the punch line. “Well, tonight’s the night. We were on our way round your house to see if you were in.”

“No way!”

I was so excited: I’d never expected them to make good on that promise, thought it was just something you’d say at three in the morning, but I was a bit nervous too. Parties at the Caves were like this secret thing that only a few people even knew about, and I’d thought I was pretty cool just knowing they existed but I thought of them like America or something, you dream about going but you know you probably never will. I actually started worrying about what it would be like, whether we’d get let in, if there was any way we could get into trouble, but my Mum was only meant to be ringing the house on Sunday and Em’s mum knew she was staying over at mine al weekend so that was alright.

“You’re a bit quiet. Here, have a try of this,” Neil passed the spliff he’s just made, ignoring our driver’s mock complaints, and I took a drag. It tasted nice, sweet and fragrant and full as it sunk into lungs and .. bloody strong! My eyes felt like they were vibrating in their sockets as I tried to focus out of the windscreen ad take another drag.

“Nice.”

I passed it forward to Trev, who was doing the driving after all, and sank back into the seat, which seemed much softer now, and I nodded towards Nick.

“Nice top.”

I felt his muscles relax a little where his side was squashed up to mine.

“Do you like it? Neil took me to buy it in this great shop today.”

“Hervia. Derek’s going to give him a job.” Neil had wriggled round to talk to us. “It’s nice isn’t it? I really want the green one.” They looked like conspirators, had obviously had a fun afternoon shopping together.

“Does anyone want some of this?” Trev passed the spliff back so Em could make a grab for it.

After that it all went a bit quiet, the weed was so strong. Trev put his new REACT tape on and we listened to the music and stared out the windows mostly, feeling like we were floating along in this lovely cocoon of music and cushiony friendship. It felt weird to be driving on the motorway to go to a party, like really we were going on holiday, except with no suitcases. I’d been to Chester and North Wales before with my mum and dad for weekends and days out so I thought it was funny that we were going past the places that I remembered from then, but with crazy music blaring on the stereo and without my parents arguing in the front. I wished Trev and Neil were my dads: I imagined that we’d live in a big old house that we’d decorate with cool things that we’d found in charity shops and have loads of records and talk about music and clothes.

The car was slowing down to turn into a Services then, which made us all wriggle up a little and collect ourselves. We parked up at the far end of the car park and climbed out, unfolding our stiff limbs, which had seemed so relaxed in the car, but we realised now had been tensed up for an hour or so. Trev ambled off towards the toilets.

“How far is it now?” The fresher air outside had revived me and I wanted to know what was happening.

“Not that far, but you have to know where you’re going,” Neil stretched his arms up and stood on his tiptoes, arching back, “so we’re waiting for some people here. Ah that’s good. Anyway it won’t start for ages.” He leant back inside the car and turned the volume up on the stereo. “I love this tune, have you heard it yet?” A kind of electronic Charleston tune came over the four/four beat. He straightened up and started to sway quickly from the waist up, screwing up his face. He looked over at Nicky, who smiled at him and they both started dancing in time, laughing, in the empty parking spaces.

“I need a wee.” Em nudged me, “you coming?”

I turned, and followed her towards the squat grey bunker of the Services, the picture of those two dancing behind me in their orange spotlight etched into my brain.

Of course once we got inside that weird brightly lit ambiance gathered us up and we had to look at everything, wandering round the shop giggling at the top shelf mags and trying to beat each other by stealing the most tacky object in there, (I think I won, with an Alsatian fridge magnet). We had enough money between us for more tobacco, and chewing gum and Rizla and some pop.

When we got back to the car Trev had bought us all little bottles of water which was cool. They were always giving us stuff, which made me feel bad because we never had much money and what we had went pretty quickly but they didn’t seem to mind, and so I tried to not think about it too much. We offered our pop around but they’d started on the Extra so they didn’t want any. A few other cars had drawn up and parked next to us to make the most of the music pumping out of Trev’s speakers. Neil seemed to know a couple of people and was chatting to a girl with long ginger hair. She was pretty and wearing a tight t-shirt and a miniskirt with trainers. She kept moving about in time to the music and nodding and smiling this beatific smile at Neil. I felt a bit jealous to be honest, I was so used to us having all his attention. They walked over to the car she had arrived in and a few moments later he came over and pressed something into my hand.

“Don’t say I never give you baby lesbians nuttin’,” he winked, and walked off.

I looked down at the pristine plastic bag in my open palm, a tiny round pill in the corner and an oblong wrap of magazine print next to it. I showed Em.

“Look, that’s like twenty five quid’s worth of stuff!”

“Yeah but he won’t have paid that for it.” Em was always the realist.

I looked up and smiled thanks over to the two of them.