05 . Morning Night and Day

I had forgotten it was August. Bright sunlight bombed through spaces in between the sycamore leaves and hit the cracked road surface like napalm. At first we ran away from the house but then gradually, as we realised no one could be bothered to chase us, we slowed down and finally stopped, panting and smiling at each other. I felt suddenly grimy in my sweat-dried clothes, wrong in the middle of a day where people would be shopping and going to the park to play on the swings. Jane was looking back down the street.

“Come on,” she panted, holding her side, “We should get away from here.”

Em moaned softly,

“God I could do with a Coke.”

“Well come on and I’ll get you a bloody Coke you daft mare.”

Jane almost skipped away. We followed obediently, but I was suspicious.

“Why are you so nervous Jane? You on the speed or summat?”

She was walking faster than she ought to be, a girl on a mission, only I couldn’t figure what that mission could be. She wheeled round, already five steps ahead of us, looked round like a cartoon villain to check if the coast was clear and swung her bag round on its strap. It was bulging with vinyl as she ripped the flap away from its Velcro and angled the opening towards us. Em yelped,

“No way!” as I hurried forward to confirm what I thought I saw in there.

A round hardwood box, inlaid with slivers of brass outlining the yin yang sign picked out in contrasting woods. I hadn’t noticed her picking that up back at the student house.

“How did you get that?”

Jane grinned.

“It was right next to my bag when I got off the bed so I kind of scooped it up without thinking, to see if it’d work.”

She looked sheepish and mischievous in turns. It made me nervous. I looked back to check they weren’t after us.

“Open it then .. “ Em was excited as hell, jigging about, not daring to touch but I could tell she was dying to. Jane dumped the bag down on the pavement and picked the box out. It was only the size of her palm, but about as deep as it was wide. She clamped her other hand over it, twisted and pulled the lid off. It gave a satisfying thunk.

There wasn’t much left for their purposes, but enough for us three: a crumpled powdery bag with a solitary pill stuck in the corner, and a pristine paper wrap. Jane tutted, fished it out and examined it.

“That’s one of Billy Whizz’s wraps you know,” she announced after a few seconds. “I could tell that anywhere. He always uses pages out of The Face,” she explained. She sniffed the packet,

“Smells sweet: it’s either cut to fuck with Tate & Lyle or it’s the good stuff.”

She shoved it under my nose and the smell caught at the back of my throat with the memory of what we’d taken the night before. I stepped back and Em grabbed at the packet to have a go herself. Jane picked the pill out and chucked both pieces of the box into the privet next to us.

“You could have given that to the Oxfam you know,” I remarked mildly, surprised at the waste.

“Yeah, and get ecognised by someone’s mate. Clever girl ..” she made a dumbo face at me and I realized she was right. She picked up her bag again and we started walking.

It was warm, well past lunchtime by the time we wandered into Chorlton, which was buzzing with mums and pushchairs and blokes coming out the pub with sweet breath and freaks shuffling out in their slippers clutching enough change for a packet of fags and a bottle of White Lightning. I was past being tired. Everything seemed much brighter than normal and a bit further away. I felt like if I put my hand out to touch anyone it would go right through them. Only me and Em and Jane were real.

Jane bought us a two-litre bottle of Lilt and some crisps and we decided to go to the park. We sat upstairs on the bus and it seemed like it took days to get there. It was packed with people and everyone was noisy and happy from having a bit of sun on their skin and they smelled of fresh sweat and perfume and sun cream. Some of the sweat wasn’t so fresh though. I looked across the aisle at Em, who’d gone quiet, and a bit green. Every time the bus set off we wobbled from side to side and when we stopped we slammed back against the velour seat backs so hard I caught my breath and the fibres pricked through my top and into my back.

When the sheer numbers of students started to slow the bus down even more, and we were totally surrounded by yakking Home Counties accents it was time to make a break for it. I nudged Em as I got up and she woke with a jerk. The person whose shoulder she’d been asleep on for the last ten minutes looked relieved, but a bit annoyed as she mumbled her apologies and half fell down the stairs behind us.

“Oy!” I laughed, and grabbed her arm to steady her, “watch it cowgirl!”

She didn’t look happy, so I thought maybe going to sleep was a bad idea, at least if it made you look that tired.